Solfest 2006

- "We've had reports of a tall, thin gentleman in a stripey green top hat shouting offers of drugs"

- baby chill out tent had man utd carpet

- Camper van next to giant letters spelling "GOAT SEX?". Inside van, legs could be seen disappearing into the roof area, "that's where they keep the goat" said Z

- Middle of the night in the family camping area, music had all stopped, very quiet then a parrot-like voice (female) struck up...
"Honesty is the best policy...fuck you!"
"it's all blah, blah, blah...fuck you!"
"Fuck you!"
"Just fuck you!"
"It's four, five times now...fuck you!"
etc
Then...
"WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP! IT'S HALF PAST THREE IN THE MORNING, THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A FAMILY CAMP SITE AND THERE'S KIDS IN HERE"

Silence

- 4 proper townies & one kid dressed as a pirate -
"Ey, Benjamin, we gan in the maze?"
"Nah, maze is shite!"

- Who decided that Peruvian clothes would be the default counter culture look?

- Pirate day, 10 am. Not much piratical activity as yet except one guy with skull and x-bones hat and a donkey jacket waving a couple of twigs. A sinister effect slightly spoilt by his Betty Boop pyjamas.

- On a day when the fancy dress theme was pirates or fairies, we were passed by one fella in pink leotard and crash helmet. Also saw a guy dressed as Mr Incredible and a couple of bad spidermen. I put on my pirate hat and was challenged to a fight by a small child in a gorilla outfit.

- B was followed round by a menacing 3 year old girl who kept trying to push him over. She had a blank stare and a fairy outfit.

- 9 am Sunday - Cumbria - farmer's field in a cold wind - a woman in pink, with pink hair and pink fairy wings walked towards the Mongolian yurt....

- Very few non-white people here

- Pirates wore the clothes of the people they robbed. I look like one who hijacked a car full of scruffy townies

- B in a red rain cape in his pushchair looked like a jelly monster. At one point he woke up, yawned, stretched and fell straight out of the pushchair onto his face, cos he wasn't strapped in.

- Food - Peacecake cafe - Camel's Arse (tagline something like "if it's good it came from the arse")

- Purple trousers, kilt, afghan goat herder hat, cat stevens beard - probably works in a bank back home

- An old wandering violinist singing a song called "I wish I was a taliban", which he seemed to make up as he went along, for 3 overexcited women in Morrocan pork pie hats.

- "Is that a little baby?"
"No, its a pig, they just dressed it up - dufus!"

- "Just go off and have fun. Stop shouting at each other"

- "Have yeww gort airnee veeegarn cayke?"
"No"
"Aaarl just have an arrple thern"